According to Hellen Chen, a renowned expert on all things marriage, over 85% of relationships end up in a breakup. That sounds bad enough when you assess the chances of your own relationship surviving through some major struggle. The future actually looks even more bleak if the problems you have are of a sexual nature, as 56% of adults state they aren’t happy with their sex life. Considering all this, you need to be extremely careful when talking to your partner about sexual problems. But you should talk because ignoring the issue is sure to end up in a painful breakup.
Do note that the ‘sexual problems’ mentioned in this article are of a health-related nature, such as STIs and other conditions that affect one partner’s health. However, these tips can be applied to conversations about your sexual desires as well.
Saving Your Relationship: How to Talk to Your Partner About Sexual Problems
1. Choose the timing carefully
The most important thing to do, when having a difficult conversation is to time it right. For a discussion of sexual problems, you both need to be clearheaded and, preferably, in a good mood. You need to be considerate of your partner’s state of mind in this situation as their first reaction might be a bit overwhelming.
The best way to go is to have your conversation on a weekend when both of you are relaxed and calm. You also need to ensure your privacy, so don’t start a discussion if there’s a risk of surprise guests showing up. To that end, you also should have a conversation at a time that will allow your partner to ‘process’ the information in a calm environment.
2. Prepare an informational package and take steps towards treatment
Before you talk to your partner about sexual problems of any kind, make sure you can explain your condition in detail. It will be best to prepare information beforehand, so your partner can look through it.
Pay extra attention to covering the treatment options in your discussion. If possible, you should start treatment even before the conversation. For example, both men and women struggling with infertility can start taking some natural supplements, like maca powder. It has shown good results in improving fertility in clinical trials. Men, suffering from any type of erectile dysfunction, can also benefit from supplements that contain maca powder, like Erexa-tropin.
Starting the treatment will show your partner how serious you are about solving this issue and keeping your relationship.
3. Get professional help
It can be extremely hard to talk to your partner about sexual problems, especially if you are struggling to accept them yourself. In this case, consulting a therapist will be the wisest choice. You can go into couple’s counseling, but it will be more beneficial to have a few individual sessions first.
During those, you can outline the parameters of your relationship to the therapist and explain your main fears. They will be able to help you develop the most effective plan for breaking the information to your partner.
4. Leave your partner some breathing room
Discussing sexual problems is stressful for both parties, and you should respect this. That’s why it’s essential to give your partner some time to absorb the information and do additional research.
If they need to do this in private, do not push them. In most cases, they aren’t doing this because they want to leave you, but because they need some time alone with their thoughts. As you know how your partner usually deals with difficult news, you should do your best to provide them with the right conditions.
You also should be prepared to have more conversations in the future, once your partner processes the information.